The demographics and culture of the middle school were quite different from the "hills" elementary school we knew. The transition was an adjustment.

Today, our younger daughter is attending the middle school and our older daughter attends high school. We have stayed with the public schools and have learned a great deal. For instance:

-Kids who have resources will do well at almost any school they attend. Children from stable families with educated parents have an enormous advantage. Parents who go private could be saving their money, because most of their kids would do fine in public schools.

-Many parents may praise diversity, but they also avoid it. By convincing themselves that myths and rumors are true, they have a set of ready-made excuses they can use to avoid public schools.

-Experiencing diversity has pros and cons. When we are stretched to learn about people outside our normal group, we develop a deeper understanding of humanity. However, the stretching can feel uncomfortable.

-It is unfair to call a school "good" or "bad" depending on average test scores. Within every school, some students are more difficult to educate than others. Too many students at "bad" schools have language, economic, social, emotional and other barriers to learning. If schools are going to help students overcome their barriers, they will need more resources than they currently receive.

-It has been heartbreaking to absorb the magnitude of social neglect in Oakland. We are witnessing a massive loss of human potential. Most people are oblivious or insensitive to the deep suffering of these children. Unless we make a greater effort to understand, we will remain ignorant forever.

-The same ignorance causes people to concoct unrealistic and simplistic solutions that they believe will fix the problems. The solutions that have become current educational policies are ineffective, inadequate and destructive.

-Many people claim to care about the education of children. Very few will turn their words into actions. This includes too many parents.

-Oakland's teachers are especially worthy of support and understanding, rather than suspicion and criticism. Their practice is extremely challenging and complicated. The majority are highly skilled, dedicated and hard working.

-Strong families who shun Oakland's public schools are contributing to the problems in those same schools today. The schools would immediately improve with an increased enrollment of stable children who have skilled parents with high standards.

-The school district needs to work harder on acknowledging and broadcasting the positive accomplishments of its students. Many students are succeeding, but the community is kept unaware.

As our family continues on this learning curve, our daughters are doing well. They are hard-working, successful and savvy students.

This community needs to stop condemning our public schools. If parents joined in an effort together, they could begin to improve the schools, one classroom at a time.

Sharon Higgins lives in the Laurel district. She works as a parent coordinator at her local middle school.

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